Inbox for sticksandbones

[lupusxylem]

I will not make this look pretty later, don't believe me it's all a lie

====

INVENTORY:

-The Punisher: Wolfwood's cross gun, normally covered in wrappings.
INFO from the mods on use so I don't forget: The cross-gun will be able to fire regular bullets (regains of these can be handwaved; silvered bullets can be purchased in the bonus AC store) just fine, without any special nerfs. The laser feature will be usable a max of 3 times a month.

-4 Vials of his Drugs(tm)
Info from the mods on use so I don't forget: Wolfwood can start with up to 5 vials of his Lab Drugs. More of these can be regained for the price of a Small Item (a maximum of 5 at once), but they will not work on other player characters for obvious reasons. Their healing ability will also be slightly nerfed to not heal anything instantaneously, but rather over a few minutes.
3/7: All Vials have been used. Will need to purchase replacements if he wants to use them again.
???: Forgot to put the date here but he's purchased more Vials, one has been used to he has 4 currently.

-A lighter

-A carton of cigarettes, more can be purchased/handwaved

-A winter coat that Heimr bullied him into purchasing

-A matching pair of boots for the coat

-A little knit wolf with sunglasses from Elsword.

-A blanket from Livio.

-A handgun with a wolf engraved on the handle.

-A black husky named Angelina

-A belt pouch to carry his regeneration vials with a cross emblazoned into the leather.

-Authentic rosary beads, with beads made from black glass and a heavy, silver cross pendant

-A black leather choker with a silver cross pendant, similar to the rosary

-A whole church(tm)

-A wool knit cat plushie from Pure Vanilla

-3 tomas chicks that currently live in Kiera's barn

-3 londonites

-Wolf skull shaped cufflinks

-A dagger for his "birthday" from Gnosis

Comments

[oleaeuropaea]

[Anyone in their right mind would be insulted by the tirade Wolfwood unleashes. Vash, idiot that he is, only starts to smile. It's a slow curl of his lips, one that Nick might even feel against his hair. It might as well be praise that's being heaped atop him, twisting at his stomach like molten knives. The warmth radiates outward, pushing back against the cold like a flame in its own right.

He shifts, forehead trailing downward until it's pressed against Wolfwood's. He can meet his eyes like this, and be grateful that at some point in the night he took his glasses off. Nick might sitll be wearing his own, but at least they're less likely to get caught on one another like this.]

Wolfwood. [His voice is little more than a whisper, and husky with all the things he's afraid to say. He angles his head just enough to rub their noses against each other.]

You're so brusque. All sharp edges and anger, but it's not all there is to you. I can see the man that cares so much beneath all that bluster and smoke. [His laugh is faint, lest he outright guffaw in the poor man's face.] You put up with me too, you know.

[lupusxylem]

[They are. Very close. Wolfwood is still wearing his shades, yes, but at this angle it's impossible for Vash to not be able to see his eyes peering up at him over the rims. His pupils are blown wide- mercifully from inebriation this time and not being uncomfortably high- as his eyes dart a little, studying Vash's face.

He looks, in that moment, shellshocked. Like Vash's mere existence has made him forget how to exist as a person. Vash has always sort of been that for him anyway, this obnoxious foil given how diametrically opposed the two of them are. Their ideals clash, their way of approaching life is at odds, yet somehow they manage to make a perfect team despite all of that. It shouldn't make sense, but it does. It's the same face he makes when Vash manages to say things that cut through his rocky heart down to its core, soft and vulnerable. Afraid to bare itself to anyone, lest he get hurt again.

Is this okay? Is it okay to have this? To just...be happy, in this moment? He's not sure. Guys like him don't deserve that.

He's overwhelmed by emotion. Because of that, much like a cat, Wolfwood leans back just a fraction of an inch before he sinks back in again, bonking his forehead against Vash's. It's a clearly affectionate gesture, given without words.]

If you're gonna say all that, you might as well call me Nick.

[oleaeuropaea]

Nick, then.

[His words are little more than a whisper. When he moves his lips, it makes it all the more obvious just how close the two of them are. It would take little more than craning his head downward just a scant few inches. It could happen in a blink of an eye, before either of them could stop it. There's no barrier, just open air.

He could, but something holds him back. It isn't fear this time, the paralyzing worry that he might drag Wolfwood down to hell with him. Sure, this thought echoes endlessly in the back of his mind, rattling 'round and 'round until he feels sick with the guilt. But not tonight. Maybe it's the alcohol. Or maybe Wolfwood finally rattled Vash's skull around until the savior in him learned to shut his damn mouth.

No, it's just simple courtesy. Their position is an intimate one, but it could still be argued that it was companionable. And at the end of the day, he respects Wolfwood more than anything. That included his boundaries.

And so - ]

Can I kiss you?

[lupusxylem]

[It's not the first time Vash has called him by his first name. In fact, it happened just weeks prior, when they were attacked in the forest and Vash definitely slipped that in there when he was calling out for him. It wasn't something Wolfwood missed, but at the time he was so busy being eaten that he couldn't really think about it. Hearing him say it now under less immediately dire circumstances leaves his heart hammering in his chest. To everyone else, he is Wolfwood. Nicholas the Punisher, if they want to be formal about it. But other than Livio, no one calls him Nick, and Livio is special in that regard.

It would have been enough to satiate whatever that gnawing feeling inside of him has been craving, at least for now. He would have been content to sit in companionable silence until they either found something else to blabber on about or fell asleep on each other. That's kindof just how reality works. Whatever his alcohol-addled brain could cook up just isn't going to happen outside of his dreams, maybe, so he might as well just-

...

Wolfwood's eyes widen, just a sliver. It's enough to take him out of that perpetual scowl and instead shift his expression into genuine shock, and if Vash expected an answer to that question any time soon, well. He's going to have to wait for more than a few seconds. It feels like hours pass, the deafening roar in his ears having reached such a fever pitch that he can't even think.

And, you know. He could give a normal answer, like normal people do. A "yes" or "no" is what Vash is looking for, here. Rules of respecting ones' boundaries and consent and all that. But Vash is so close right now that he can smell the alcohol on his breath, and Vash could probably pluck that lollipop stick from Wolfwood's mouth without using his hands if he wanted. Well, one of Wolfwood's hands is held in Vash's while the other is being effectively pinned against his side, so...

It means that he has to turn his head and spit the stick out onto the floor, and instead of answering Vash at all, he leans forward and closes the gap on his own. He kisses Vash without a single word uttered, right then and there, like he's been thinking about doing it this whole time yet would have sooner died than done so himself.

Not anymore, it seems. Not when he somehow struggles his other arm free, sliding it around Vash from behind so he can hold the back of his neck, as if to keep him in place as he tilts his head to make their connection more seamless.

He's not thinking. Not anymore.]

[oleaeuropaea]

[Vash's lips part to protest the mess he's making, only to be promptly silenced as Wolfwood crashes against him. He can still taste the lingering sweetness, better than any shared cigaratte or liquor bottle could ever be. All at once, his body wants to take in more, to lap greedily into his mouth in an effort to chase that taste.

It's a small miracle that Wolfwood distracts him, those rough fingers scraping over the tender flesh of his neck. The shudder that follows is a bodily one, one that Nick will surely feel given the way their bodies press together. It reminds him to shift his own body, easing back just a little bit even as his the cybernetic hand twines around his shoulders. Where he goes, he coaxes Wolfwood along, making sure that connection doesn't break.

It's only once they're settled into something slightly more comfortable — Vash propped back on his elbows, still holding his hand and clutching to his back for dear life — that he thinks about properly indulging his fantasy. Tentatively, his lips part, a kittenish lick drawing along Wolfwood's lower lip. He tastes the flavor of that lollipop once more, and hopes he'll be permitted more. Admittedly, his movements are just a little unsteady. He isn't inexperienced, having had over a century of life to pursue the more human experiences he had admired. But the stiffness of each motion implies something more unpracticed. Regardless of what experience he has, it's certainly been awhile since he's put it into practice.

It doesn't seem to inhibit his enjoyment, given the way his heart rabbits within his chest. But if Wolfwood was expecting someone with more prowess, he would almost certainly be disappointed]

[lupusxylem]

[This probably would have gone better if Wolfwood had just let Vash kiss him first at his own pace, but "better" is swiftly becoming relative now that they've suddenly shifted positions, with Wolfwood practically laying forward across Vash now given the way he moved to facilitate it. Even though he smoked a cigarette before Vash came up, the nicotine is completely smothered by the mingled flavors of whiskey and sweet sugar, both playing off each other as Vash sneaks his way into a curious taste. Unlike Vash, who has experience although minimal, Wolfwood has a fair amount of it...just don't ask him how, where, or why. Just that it's been a really long ass time. Alcohol, as a general rule, factored into those moments to be sure.

Honestly, he isn't expecting anything at all. Even if Vash just pecked his lips and left it at that, he thinks it would have been fine. Endearing, even. Instead, he surprises him by an immediate bid for something more than that...which Wolfwood is going to oblige readily. Only this time, he's the one who gets to thread his fingers up through Vash's hair, traveling from the back of his neck into the shorter hairs just above his nape.

In answer to that silent question, Wolfwood lets his lips part as well. It's inviting as much as it is reciprocating as he licks his way back into Vash's mouth, and he swears to god that Vash tastes sweet despite having imbibed just the alcohol this evening. He wants more of it. He wants...

Well. He wants to kiss this idiot's brains out, so that's what he's focusing on now. That way he can't run his mouth, not if Wolfwood's pressing into him with the fervor of that kiss, yet it's more the intent than it is rough or overwhelming. Actually...it's quite gentle, for someone like Wolfwood. Slow and easy, just the sound of their lips making contact in the room now.]

[oleaeuropaea]

[The response to even the slightest touch within his hair is a mournful sigh. It comes dangerously close to something more audible, though Vash manages to bite it back at the last second. The last thing he wants is to make a fool of himself, or even give the wrong idea of where he wants this to go. He's fine with just the kiss, deep as it's become. He wants to relish just this moment for as long as he can

His tongue brushes back against Wolfwood's, scraping over his in a desperate bid to memorize every second of this moment. If, in the future, he was ever denied this contact, then he would at least have the memories to hold close to his chest. Not that he wants to think that far into the future.

Not that he wants to think, period.

Admittedly, he feels a little guilty for letting their positions get so rearranged. He'd meant to lead the charge into the kiss, rather than acquiesce to his leadership. He can't exactly protest that change in direction, however. He's far more concerned with thumbing over the back of that hard worn hand, in tandem with massaging circles into his back.]

[lupusxylem]

[Wolfwood isn't exactly in the business of thinking either. That's for another time, when the booze has worn off and they can fully process the consequences of their actions here tonight, whatever those may end up being. Going from having a heart to heart, to crying on each other, to kissing isn't a leap made without something simmering under the surface, and these two have been fighting unresolved sexual tension basically the entire time they've known each other. It's just not something they've verbalized, because Vash was too busy pushing Wolfwood away, and Wolfwood would rather chew on glass than be vulnerable like that to literally anyone.

With Vash, though...it comes easy, somehow. He knows Vash isn't going to turn it around on him in some kind of cruel, malicious way, and even if this is the only moment they ever share...then Vash wouldn't hold his actions here against him. He'd treat him the same as he does anyone else, frustratingly genuine and kind to a fault in ways Wolfwood can and will never be. Vash shouldn't have to feel guilty about the request to kiss turning into being kissed, because Wolfwood was likely going to backslide into being assertive unless directed to otherwise. It's kindof all he knows, from his days at the orphanage up to now.

It's just nice. They kiss, and it's really nothing special. It's uncoordinated and a little sloppy, and every so often they bump noses painfully. Their teeth click together audibly at least once in a way that makes Wolfwood wince, but it doesn't stop him either. In fact, his breath shudders against Vash's lips at the feeling of his hand moving against his back, his thumb brushing over his hand, all of these...excessively fond gestures that make him feel like crying. They part. They kiss. Part, kiss.

Eventually, Wolfwood has to come up for air at some point. Maybe Vash too, reluctantly. It leaves Wolfwood just an inch away from Vash's face, his hair falling into his eyes. His fingers are still tangled loosely into the back of those blonde locks as Wolfwood finally manages words, a little hoarse now from disuse.]

You're so... [...] God.

[Their foreheads bump together. Maybe he forgot what he was going to say, or never had anything TO say to begin with.]

[oleaeuropaea]

[The kiss is blissful. It's a perfectly imperfect mess, and Vash can think of nothing better. They've both always been clumsy idiots. Their descent into whatever sort of relationship this is was just as rocky and unsteady — why wouldn't their first kiss match it. Everything about it feels blissfully human, fragile and clumsy, and of course he eats it right up.

If he had to complain about anything, it'd be the fact that it ends too soon. His lips already feel swollen, and that's to say nothing about the ragged breaths he draws in, trying to catch up on his poor oxygen intake. He should, by all means, be taking a breather. Yet still he wants.

The urge is tempered as Wolfwood speaks, at least slightly. A soft breath leaves him, one that shakes at the edges. Vash feels so full in this moment, brilling with light and warmth that he can't say he's felt before. Yes, the glimmering resplendence of pure joy tickles at the back of his mind, threatening to awaken something dark to snatch it all away, but for now it remains silent and slumbering.]

Stupid? An idiot? [When he speaks, it's hushed and breathless. He tempers it with an equally fluttering laugh, before angling his head to kiss at the corner of his mouth.]

'm sure that list goes on.

[lupusxylem]

[Ooooh my god this guy is going to kill him, Jesus Christ.

How are you supposed to act, really, when the mere act of kissing a guy makes him look at you like you put the stars in the sky? Granted, Wolfwood would have to have one hell of a strong constitution to say he isn't feeling similarly, he just is too drunk still to really untangle the web of emotions he's feeling right now. It...hurts. But he's also...happy? He thinks? A foreign emotion to be sure, one that he isn't sure he can even trust. Yet, Vash manages to shatter any trepidation that manages to creep in by leaning in to kiss him again, his lips just barely brushing the edge of his mouth in a way that coaxes Wolfwood into chasing him for another kiss right back, as if he can't stand to be outdone.

He licks his lips, thoughtful. The sweetness of sticky sugar is strong between them still, as is the bitter aftertaste of the whiskey. Despite that, Wolfwood is certain he can taste something that is uniquely Vash underneath the surface, addictive to him in a way that's legitimately scary.

What's going to happen, when they've sobered up and have to come to terms with what they've done? What's going to happen, even, between now and then to add on to the pile? He just doesn't know.

...right. Vash just said something, didn't he?]

Yeah. Really fucking stupid.

[Wolfwood makes a face, then he leans in and kisses Vash's forehead.]

But for some reason, I wanna keep kissin' you.

[oleaeuropaea]

[The longer Vash dwells in Wolfwood's company, the more his chest begins to ache. It isn't a negative sensation on its own, but a fullness and warmth that seems to bloom so radiantly that it threatens to crack through his ribs. Like his companion, Vash, too, could weep. He's always felt his emotions so vividly that it's hard not to wear them on his sleeve. It makes a heady cocktail when paired with the fact that it's been so damn long since he's felt something joyous.

Both of his hands shift, sliding across whatever bare skin and rumpled clothing they must to reach the planes of Wolfwood's face. He traces just the tips of his fingers, metal and flesh alike, over his cheekbones, then down over his jaw. Fascinated, he even thumbs over Wolfwood's lip with the hand of flesh, before shifting aside to steal yet another kiss for himself.

This is his somehow. Some precious thing wrapped in a bristling, growling package. What had he, a blasphemy from the very beginning, have done to deserve this.]

You act like I'm gonna complain, Nick. [Those fingers slide back into his hair once more, then down to loop over his shoulders. He uses that anchor point to lift himself just enough, burying his face against Wolfwood's neck. The smell of tobacco, alcohol, and syrupy sugar all should have been too much on their own, but on this man? They're the perfect combination.]

[lupusxylem]

[Wolfwood could honestly ask himself the same thing. A man wholly undeserving of love, someone who has spent his entire life killing to save others, a direct challenge to Vash's obstinate way of life. If Vash were a different type of person, he would probably detest that so much that being with Wolfwood at all, even as an acquaintance, wouldn't fly. Lucky for Wolfwood then that Vash is perhaps the most understanding person to ever exist, a complete anomaly in the world of his kind. Somehow, all of humanity's capacity for kindness and compassion got distilled into one person, and somehow, it's now being directed at him.

He looks down at Vash blearily as they share a moment of silence in the semi-gloom of his bedroom, with Vash's fingertips ever-so-delicately tracing the planes of his face, as if trying to memorize them. It makes Wolfwood's skin crawl, goosebumps rising along his arms and up the back of his neck just as Vash makes it a point to put his hands in his hair (dangerous), then buries his face against his neck (dangerous).

He wants...god. He doesn't know. Not once has he been sure. Right now more than anything, he's riding on instinct, booze, and what his gut is telling him whether that's the smart thing to do or not. He's already made peace with the fact that Vash is going to be sleeping in this bed with him tonight, and if Wolfwood has anything to say about it, they may just...make out lazily like this until they fall asleep. You know, just guys being dudes. Because, uh...

Wolfwood is no longer merely crouched over Vash. His body feels heavy, and so he simply just...lays down against him, letting their weight rest together and their limbs tangle haphazardly as Wolfwood turns to kiss Vash's face. He said he wanted to kiss him, and so he does...peppering him with brief brushes of his lips against skin. His jaw, his cheek, up to his temple and again along his forehead. Nothing is spared.]

[oleaeuropaea]

[This is all so... sweet. It's beyond not just what Vash might have expected ,but also deserved. Having brushed elbows with Wolfwood as long as he had, he knew the Punisher was capable of gentleness, but he'd never seen it in action. Again, that sinister voice in his mind cries out how undeserving he is, but once more it's held at bay.

A soft whisper of a laugh as stubble scrapes across his skin, but it's far from that booming and exuberant laugh that Vash is known for. Truthfully, the touches have a somewhat lulling effect on Vash. It isn't helped by the weight now pressing down against his body. He's still half-dressed, and his boots are still on and dangling off the bed, but it doesn't keep his eyes from closing. He sighs, trying to exhale all of the exhaustion now churning within his body.]

Nick... [His smile is warm and syrupy, absolutely smitten with the idiot of a man above him. How could he not be, when he's just as big of an idiot.]

[lupusxylem]

[Is it sweet, or is it just a byproduct of Wolfwood being drunk? That's for Vash to ask himself, whether he even cares or not. By the time he's finished kissing Vash's face pretty much everywhere he can feasibly reach, he'll sink back down against him once his shoulders and elbows start to protest holding him up. Now he's actually laying down on Vash because he doesn't want to support his own weight anymore, sorry. At least he isn't super heavy compared to most things, and Vash has the support of the mattress underneath to keep his back from aching. Honestly, this is Not the most Heterosexual position they could be in, but if Wolfwood were to move they'd just barely manage to fit together on this tiny bed to begin with, so!

It's fine. Don't worry about it.

Wolfwood makes his way back down, and when he bypasses Vash's jaw, he hesitates. Then, for just a brief moment as clarity fights against "fuck it", in which case "fuck it" ends up winning because I said so because Wolfwood is still a bit too drunk to shake it off. His hand shifts in Vash's hair, fingers still carding up through where his hair is longer and blonde at the ends, all while he traces a path down to kiss the side of his neck. He kisses along the hollow of his throat (he is DEFINITELY drunk) and stops when he reaches the point where that dumb turtleneck of his stops him from going any further, prompting him to he huffs deeply like a world-weary dog.

Then, he sags against Vash and lays his head down against his chest, stopping there with one hand still idly petting his hair, a nonsensical mumble rumbling past Wolfwood's lips.]

[oleaeuropaea]

[There's a moment where Vash has to panic wonder about where this is going to go. That moment comes as those lips slide down his neck. Thrills run through him, both heated and electrified. His head arches upward, lips pulling taut as he resists the urge to whimper and whine. He's always been a sensitive guy, both emotionally and physically. The fact that he isn't outright squirming right now is a small miracle in and of itself.

And then his head comes to a rest, laid above where his heart is now thoroughly racing. The feeling slowly begins to subside, though the sweat at the back of Vash's neck will take some time to dissipate. He can't say he doesn't prefer it this way, though. He doesn't regret what they've done, but he also hasn't had time to think either.

The last thing he wants is to leap over the edge, only to have regrets. Pulling back now might wound them both, but it would be so egregious as doing so after they slept together.

— a thought that Vash isn't going to pursue any further, thank you. He angles his head back down once more, tucking himself into Wolfwood's hair with a sigh.]

Should get some rest...

[lupusxylem]

[Fortunately for poor Vash's heart, kissing is about as much as Wolfwood is willing to do while he's this drunk. Sure, the booze helps in making sure he isn't stopping himself last second by having second-thoughts or some sort of trepidation borne of a perceived lack of deservedness. But so far they've just...kissed. That's something you could- theoretically- come back from. Vash could very easily laugh it off later as something they just fell prey to while inebriated, and Wolfwood would ride on the coattails of that no matter how much it hurt.

It wouldn't be ideal, not for his heart. But he would learn to live with it, just like how he's learned to live with everything else.

For now, he wants to hold this close for as long as he can. Not to say that his own thoughts, like Vash's, aren't wandering too.]

Mmhh...

[A sound of agreeing acknowledgement leaves Wolfwood in another deep sigh, and judging by the way he's just gone kindof limp and boneless against Vash, it's clear that he isn't going to get up unless Vash rolls him onto the floor.

He is tired and overwhelmed, but for once...for now, things feel. Okay.

As he drifts into the lull of silence that falls between them, listening to the hummingbird beating of Vash's heart, he thinks about how Vash asked if he could kiss him.]